The Long-Anticipated Prom Post

This post is MAINLY for L, one of my BFFS, but I guess other people are allowed to read it. Heh. Neh, I’m kidding. Enjoy it all you like. Since the theater way was harder to write, I’ll go with bullet points this time :).

  • 1: Where I live, it’s a city of blue surrounded by red, so often queer peeps can’t go to proms being themselves. So the prom is a HUGE DEAL. Dress is not regulated, so you can literally wear anything. The outfits varied from casual street wear (me) to elaborate homemade dresses, makeup, and haircuts. Everyone was going all out for this.
  • 2 : I was supposed to meet some friends at the prom- W and her friends. So for the first half, I looked EVERYWHERE. From the silk-screening room ( I made an awesome bag with the phases of the moon on it. I later decorated it with my new black ink pens…) to the dance hall/dining area.
  • 1&1/2: Actually, let me back up a sec. S dropped me off @ the Andy Warhol Museum, then left, leaving me alone with a TON of awesome people. To give you an image of the people there, the line went around the block. Since I arrived one minute early, I took at least another minute to speedwalk to the end of the line. I met some people, including this very tall and flirty girl named Treasure (No, really. This is only proper name I’m putting in here, though). She winked at me all night, but she wasn’t REALLY my type, so I just shrugged it off. I went inside with her group, and we commented on all the really cool outfits and accessories we saw. Then we went inside, and ate some tacos and brownies, then split up, looking for something to do. I socialized, made small talk, and generally chatted until I realized I had not seen my friends yet. (Read 2 again)
  • 3 : I found my friends in the silkscreening room later and then, when they were done with their projects, we went upstairs and danced awkwardly on the edge of the crowd. Well, they did. I was fully loosened up at this time. NOTHING could make me feel awkward about myself. I did all kinds of reckless things, including kissing a girl as a three-minute stand after failing to grind with her, saying the CRAZIEST things, and eating all of the brownies. And I only drank water, because I thought (in my paranoid state)  that the punch would be spiked.

That was it. I got a ride back home, and Dad gave me a lecture on how I could get the Kissing Disease if I wasn’t careful. I’m not REALLY planning on telling my current girlfriend ANY of this…

-Jer

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Montreal, Prom, and Other Worries

My fam (8 people, to be exact) went to Montreal a week ago. It was AMAZING! Everything was in French- I picked it up along the way. Voir? Je connais le francais!

Ok, not really. You can thank Google Translate for any French I post. Yep. Pathetic. But I AM really terrible at learning languages. I have learned how to communicate non-verbally with my face. I had a silent conversation with a Montrealer that went like this( at least I think so):

Me: Man, that woman is seriously annoying. I feel sorry for you

Random girl: Yeah, that’s my boss. I’m used to it.

Me: Well, I hope it ends soon. Nice seeing you! Bye!

Random girl: Thanks. Bye!

Well, that’s what I like to think at least.

We went to a TON of museums, parks, walked, gawked, and did generally stupid tourist things, such as forget our credit card inside a pay machine (thanks ever so much Dad), accidentally turn down a bike-only street (yes, they have those), and have a good time. I managed to have another piano escapade, involving my piano skills an unusually charming construction worker (“Thees piano wvas MADE for you”) , and social-media-happy spectators. Let’s explain this the theater way:

Scene 1

Background:  A park atop Mont Royal has an unparalleled view of Montreal at its greatest. Therefore it is a popular tourist site, with tourists lounging around. There is a piano halfway between the bathrooms and the balcony, which provides said unparalleled view. A Construction Worker (CW) is refurbishing the piano, as it is old and un-tuned. Enter Jerilynn, a piano player for nine years, with an unhealthy obsession of pianos, terrible or beautiful.

Jerilynn (approaching piano) : Sir, may I play this piano?

CW (turns around with a beautific expression on his face): Mademoiselle! This piano was MADE for you! Are you playing Chopin or Bach?

Jerilynn(sighs; it is evident that she gets this question all the time but still regrets saying her answer): No, I cannot play them. I will improvise.

CW: Alright, thank you! (Walks off happy, his work delayed).

Jerilynn plays first Yuri!!!On Ice, the official song of the anime of the same name, then plays a few improvised songs inspired by her surroundings. She does not notice the spectators taking pictures of her and recording her playing. Finally, she plays Beauty and the Beast, from the musical of the same name, and more people migrate nearer to her as she plays. During Ever just the same, she sees and hears a couple dancing to the music, laughing and joking, but nevertheless dancing. After she finishes playing, she goes home. At that point, her fam show her the pics and clips they got of other people taking videos and pictures of her. She is awed.

Alright, the end for THAT story! I’ve decided against telling you folks about the prom-it was too personal an experience, and I’ve gotten ridiculously different reactions of that story. Plus, I think I’ve written enough, don’t you think?

Oh, and the other worries include a healthy dose of self-doubt(that I’m smart enough to go on to 10th grade), Mom’s back pain, Dad’s abdominal hernia, and F’s bedroom ceiling falling in. Yep, what a GREAT week or two I’ve had.

I’ll ONLY post the Prom if YOU want me to! Comment please and I’ll do it. ‘Kay?

-Jer

New/Old Friends, Drama,and Halsey Concerts (Ok, sorry about the long title, I’m just trying to make sense of it all).

What interesting topic I introduced in my title should I cover first? HMMMM… no, I’ll go in order. Mostly. No promises, though.  Get ready for my life to be blasted at you at top volume.

So, I was walking home from the park  (softball practice wasn’t happening because of the huge mud puddles in the middle of the field), and I saw a group of school kids walking past, chatting about Instabam or something of the sort (just kidding, it’s Instagram. I’m not COMPLETELY out of touch with the current generation), and I faintly recognized one of them- A, from a zoo program I had taken a while back. So I called out, ” A? Is that you? It’s me, Jer.” She perked up immediately and ran back to me and squeezed the life force out of me, whilst apologizing her heart out for not recognizing me (Remember my haircut? Plus I was wearing bada** sunglasses and a Hard Rock Cafe jacket that was my mom’s, so of course she didn’t notice who I was). I then met her friends, who are cool and love Audrey Hepburn from My Fair Lady ( Classy folks). So we hung out until after 9:30 pm, and have talked and hung out together a couple times since.  They go to school, so they have been sharing their drama-llama lives while I feel SUPER grateful that I don’t have to go through school AND home life drama. Oh, and I also ordered tickets to the upcoming Halsey concert in Pittsburgh! I can’t wait!

By the way, I wrote this draft AGES ago, so here’s an update: I’m going to A’s house for a sleepover tonight. One of her friends is planning on bringing Edward Scissorhands, but both of us agree that we’re too scared to watch that one…

-Jer

The Huge Surprise Party

Hola, all! I hope you have had a nice, RELAXING weekend watching some random TV show and eating chocolate dessert tacos. Oh come on, they’re the BEST, I swear! Really! Ok, enough of that. So after CLEANING ALL WEEK, our first guests came on Friday morning for brunch, although I was with my mom at her aunt’s nursing home playing the piano for them, so I didn’t know about these guests until after lunchtime. Still. Then was THE MOST AMAZING- I should really stop emphasizing everything with caps-lock. But ok, it was pretty good. What am I talking about again? Oh right, the pizza. Right. It was good. The end.

Ok, not really, but it was fun to do that, building up to it, then making light of it. Heh.

So that was dinner on Friday. Next came SATURDAY. (What was that? Oh, the italics and boldness. Why? Sorry, I was just messing around with it. Don’t mind me.)

AHEM! Let’s keep going, eh?

So I missed Saturday morning brunch at my house too, because I was too busy learning about the biology of behavior in animals and rodents (cute little things- did you know that guinea pigs from Asia actually infected all of Europe instead of the black rats. So there. That’s why guinea pigs shouldn’t be pets. Ha.) Ok, moving ONWARD!

So, I managed to miss both boring brunches with a valid excuse. Not every day I can accomplish something like that. Although I should have been there when my Uncle B asked Dad whether I knew that I had a lesbian haircut. Actually, I shouldn’t have been there, but I wanted to see his reaction when Dad said, “She knows- she IS lesbian.” According to Dad and Mom and every other eyewitness I could find, B started lecturing Dad on acceptance and all that when Dad, Mom, and I had resolved this issue MONTHS ago. Also, apparently B was outdated on a couple of points, but Dad figured that he would learn eventually and just pretended to listen, as I had educated him already.

(Side story: As soon as I learned about queerness, I researched it thoroughly to give myself the right idea. I then memorized the list of LGBTQ+ vocabulary definitions I had found on the internet. By doing so, I had become the most knowledgeable person in my family about the topic. When I tried to come out to my parents, I found that they were awesome, but needed some teaching on trans and gender versus orientation definitions and all that jazz. At least I didn’t have to teach Daddy or A.Whew! Side Story End.)

So after missing brunch for the second time, I hung out with relatives and talked and didn’t eat, no matter how concernedly B was looking at me (Since my detox diet, I have become less hungry, so all I had had for the day was a pumpkin muffin. This is a good thing, as before I would have eaten 5 muffins, and reached for a 6th, before realizing I ate too many.)

When everyone left to go nap (not kidding), we were left alone for about 5 seconds, then my mom’s parents arrived. I was trying to figure out the internet on my new computer from the aforementioned great-aunt, and asked them for help. Eventually they had to leave to get ready for the big event coming up, but they were confident that Dad could help me. It turned out that the next day, I figured it out in about two seconds and have been using this lovely Dell Latitude E6510 ever since. (For those of you who don’t know your computers, it’s really old and slow.)

Now for the BIG EVENT! I spent over TWO HOURS trying to pick out my shirt. Turns out I picked the wrong one. Sure, it looked nice. But it rode up like crazy, threatening to expose my pants (British version). I had to constantly pull the shirt down over my pants (American version).

Anyways, have I described the venue yet? My amazing mom managed to reserve the new Hyatt hotel in our area to host the dinner party. She brought caterers in, drove over half an hour away to get the cake(a huge sheet one, with candied almonds on top and vanilla pudding in the middle), and organized the busing of relatives there and back. We still have the balloons from the party floating around the house. It was truly a magnificent affair. The food was delicious (I had a taco, 9 pieces of tuna sashimi, and pepsi.) I would have eaten more, but I was restraining myself.

Then after dinner, a bunch of people stood up and made speeches (some funny and most meaningful). After like 30 (just kidding- more like 10), the birthday man was like, “Enough!” And everyone laughed. Then us kids were driven home and we went to bed (don’t make me mention my brief mental breakdown).  And yeah, that’s what happened. It was classy, fun, and grownupish. Yup.

Thanks for everything, all! You are helping me through my sickness by making me feel irresponsible for not blogging all week and instead watching anime. I can recommend some if you are curious. 🙂

-Jer

Pittsburgh’s March for Science

 

Alright, peeps! I, Dad and older sis went to the March for Science in Pittsburgh. Yeah, sorry for repeating the title. Anyways, I brought my ART SUPPLIES (totally deserving of the capitalization- I got several brush and India Ink pens from Seattle) to make posters with. They all sucked, trust me. I will not share their suckage with you folks, because I threw them out in disgust with myself. So yeah. I don’t have them. Anyways, the march was pretty cool, although science-appreciators aren’t big on chanting, so the noise level was 1/3 hearted rather than halfhearted. I tried to make up for the lack of noise, but it didn’t do anything but make me feel happier with myself. Some chants included “Build bridges, not walls! Pittsburgh is for all!” and others of that ilk. There were a couple that were really hard to chant, so I didn’t even bother to write it here. Mostly because I forgot them, but also because I’m lazy.  And I met a girl, M, there. She’s an awesome college student, but don’t worry, she’s ace. So it’s all good. We exchanged e-mails and the rest is history. Oh, and I got a haircut today!!!!!!! Ok, calm down, Jer. No need for hysterics. Oh, and there’s me with my haircut down below.   2017-04-25-123347Thank you for reading! See you AFTER next weekend when I can tell you the entire story of my step-grandpa’s 790th (actually 70th) birthday. It may not seem like SUCH a BIG DEAL, but he is the first of his male relatives to have survived that old, so yay him.

Have a great week!

-Jer

My Dreaded Apology Note

I apologize profusely to those who have been waiting for an awesome description of my Friday, but I alas have no time to write it. I hope y’all will be satisfied with this paltry excuse. Welp, got to go and dream about my crush.

Bye!

Jer

The Dreaded Girl Scouts and Failed Flirting

Firstly, I’m a single lesbian. If you hate me now, just skive off. Ok, so I’m a Girl Scout too. No, I don’t hit it off with the other girls( they’re like twelve).We, as Girl Scouts, do cookie booths, where basically you stand there for at LEAST two boring hours trying to get people passing by to buy cookies from you. The best places to sell (ie, those that are most entertaining) are places near college campuses. College kids are hilarious to watch, as their kid-like need for all things sugar is combated by the need for being an adult and listening to reason. Our case is helped further by the occurrence of the marvelous card-reader, which handily gets rid of the excuse: “I have no cash on me.” Great, amiright?

So, I was doing my attention-catching thing, namely seeking to get and maintain eye contact whilst grinning manically, and this guy goes back and forth, trying to decide whether to buy cookies. In order to keep his attention on us, I wink at him. That was the absolute wrong move. For then he comes back and asks me whether us Girl Scouts would be there tomorrow. I said that SOMEONE would be there. Then he says,

“No, are YOU gonna be there tomorrow?”

I say,” Nope! But Mom will.”

He walks away sadly. But yeah. That was the first time I had been flirted at by a member of the opposite sex who was a complete stranger. Mom later said that he wasn’t really attractive (I couldn’t tell) and that he was over 21 (that I COULD tell) and that he was an idiot (ditto).

Both of my parents found this extremely amusing, but I was a bit disappointed. If only that guy had been a hot girl…………….

Jer